endurance

Seriously, How does this happen. I started typing this ages ago and now I am tempted to just toss it. Toss it like I do so many other posts. It’s like the moment has passed. Well, I’m kinda sick of seeing my sprinter break pictures so I think I’ll put this up anyway.

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A couple of weeks ago, I got to speak in church. And for those of you who are concerned about the culture of Mormonism that says women do not speak last, you will be happy to know I spoke anchor. This was not the first time, actually most times, in my speaking career, I am the last to speak. Anyway that is not the point, sorry.

My topic that was assigned was enduring to the end. I had 3 weeks to prepare but as luck would have it, or human nature, I ended up leaving it to the last minute. Sure I read stuff and thought about my subject, and prayed, but didn’t really give it a solid sit down and pound the thing out until the saturday before. You see I was struggling. I wanted to give the talk the way I was meant to, but I didn’t really like the direction I was inspired to take.

3 or 4 nights before I gave my talk, I was experiencing a bout of insomnia. I hate this particular kind. It’s the one where you fall asleep fine, but wake up at the ridiculous hour of 2:38am and can’t get back to sleep. I hate those nights. It’s not like I am feeding a newborn, so I really don’t need to be up. It’s the useless kind of awake that really frustrates me. However, it’s also the time I get my guidance from my Heavenly Father. It doesn’t happen all the time, just when I need it. So on that particular night I was told to speak about why we quit. I thought that to be too peculiar, but since I was awake I came up with some reasons, it wasn’t like I was going back to sleep anytime soon.

The next morning, I ran my idea past my husband. He didn’t say much, but he also someone who doesn’t particularly like a discussion from the other side of the coin. You know the kind when someone wants to discuss the existence of God and his power, so the testify of the reality of Satan. Don’t get me wrong, those are great but sometimes they avoid the issue and are a bit dramatic. I guess like most men my husband doesn’t like drama. So anyway, his lack of discussion on the way I thought I should take it made me think perhaps that was wrong. Let me be clear he wasn’t implying it was, it’s just how I felt.

So I dropped it. I decided I would, like so many before me come up with the athletic analogy and what you learn from it tying it to scripture. I think I wrote about 3 or 4 talks that way but they all seemed wrong. I was frustrated. I think I may have even yelled heavenward. Heh. Yeah, I know not one of my best moments.

After my children went to bed and my Husband retired to the bedroom to watch TV on his iPad, I tried again. It only took me 10 minutes and it just flowed. Why? I honestly believe it was because I wrote the talk He wanted me to write. I wrote on why we quit. The focus was on religion, but I think the reasons why we quit, apply to everything. Just incase someone is struggling I thought I would post exerts from my talk.

Fear causes us to question. It causes us to doubt. Some questions might sound like:

What will happen if I don’t succeed?

What will others think of me?

What if things don’t go smoothly?

What if I embarrass my self?

What if this really isn’t right?

What if I look the fool?

Some of those questions sound quite familiar. I know I’ve used them especially in my running life. The thing is these question will always come. They will come to try our faith and they will come to try the secular areas two. I think the most important thing is to remember what your goal is. Where do you want to be. The fog most definitely will come, but if we are really doing what will get us to where we want to be, then we need not fear. It also helps to develop that relationship with God so that we can feel his love, because perfect love casteth out all fear.

Another reason we quit is pain.  When there is a hurt, through offense or loss, if we are not strong we may turn away from the Lord. Often times we hear of those who have been offended and have left the church never to return.

Some years ago in relief society I decided to comment on a lesson. I had not intended to read the scripture as in context the whole chapter applied, but was asked to find the most relative verse. I was flustered, my palms were sweaty and for some reason I couldn’t find it so I just started at the beginning. Others were trying to be helpful and suggesting verses, but one lady behind me, said “why don’t you just sit down and let the teacher teach the lesson.” Mortified I ended reading and sat down. I don’t know if the lady meant for me to hear it. I don’t know who the lady was; I prayed that I would never find out mostly for my own soul. As I was driving home I honestly considered quitting. Luckily for me there is a week between sundays and I was able to remind myself what was really important. We should never let the nay sayers keep us from what we want. It may take time to forgive. I think if I found out who said it, I may have trouble forgiving them now, but not as much as if I knew back them.

It is so important to have those spiritual experiences to use as life rafts and it’s so important to be mindful of what we say, even when we think we cannot be heard.

Thirdly we sometimes quit because we feel alone. The adversary tells us that no one know how we feel. There is no one to call. There is no one who has done what I have done. But the Hymn “How Firm a Foundation” Teaches us the Lord is with us always.

“Fear Not I am with thee,

Oh be not dismayed.

For I am they God

And will still give thee aid.

I’ll strengthen thee, help thee,

And cause thee to stand,

Upheld by my righteous omnipotent hand.”

He will not test us beyond that which we can bare and should we stray off course, through him and the atonement, we can come back.

The last reason for quitting I would like to talk about we don’t like being told what to do. We don’t want to submit to his will. Often others tell us that any form of obedience is blind obedience. We forget that we can choose to be obedient. 

Elder Hales states:

Our greatest example comes from the life of our Savior and Redeemer, Jesus Christ. When suffering upon the cross at Calvary, Jesus felt the loneliness of agency when He pled to His Father in Heaven, “Why hast thou forsaken me?” (Matt. 27:46). The Savior of the world was left alone by His Father to experience, of His own free will and choice, an act of agency which allowed Him to complete His mission of the Atonement.

Finally to just remind us all: Sundays Will Come. Happy Belated Easter and thanks Jessica for the Link

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