I know what its like to be in charge, to be the parent. I know how to be loving, I know when they need discipline and sometimes how to give it.
In my calling I am not the parent. I am a leader. I am a support. I am to be there to guide, like a parent, but not. At times I feel frustration because of some lack of commitment, the inability to not follow through and decisions being made. In just about any other circumstance I would know what to do, but the situations are fragile. That makes it hard. Again I am not the disciplinarian. That is not my role.
I hear and watch. My heart breaks. I didn’t think it would. Especially this soon. I see consequences coming. Things that bring me sadness. I feel as if I should be doing something. Sometimes I am but I am a tree alone in the forrest where no one is there to hear. I’m not falling. I’m just rustling.
I want to do right by them. So I hope. I pray. I reach out. Maybe that is all I can do. I’ll be here just in case. I know I’m supposed to be here. So I will be.